Mentally Preparing for Surgery

Any surgery can cause distress.  We often worry about how our bodies will be altered and how comparably they will function after an operation. Recovery times may also cause us to worry about what we will do with our downtime and how we will stay sane during a time when we might not be able to do the activities that make us happy. For the past decade, I have been an avid rock climber with such a strong passion for my sport that it drives every life decision I make. During that decade, I have also had 3 major surgeries including a heart surgery and one ACL replacement (I had 2 other ACLs replaced in the previous decade). The thing that both of these procedures had in common was that they took me away from my passion and forced me to see who I am when I can’t be who I have been.  My heart surgery required 5 weeks of heavy restriction followed by another year of building back to my pre-surgery abilities. My ACL had a very similar timeline, which I am just finishing up as I write this. 

The thing I have learned through this process of rebuilding is how my brain functions when life as I know it gets pulled away for a while. It is easy to get down. It is normal to experience depression during these low points.  In contrast, it is also possible to approach this devastating phase of life with a mindset that will lead to a more successful recovery and more sanity while you’re going through it. I do not believe in toxic optimism, because surgeries can be horrible, but I do believe in being in control of our mindset and how we choose to see our situations. Here are some of realizations that I have made through my time after surgeries:

The first thing I have learned through my experience is to make room for healing. That’s your full time job. If you were a runner before an Achilles surgery, sorry, but that is not your job right now. If you were a world class kayaker and now need a rotator cuff replacement, don’t look for rivers you can run with one arm.  From the moment you get out of surgery, you are now in charge of healing and that needs to be the focus.  Twenty-four hours a day, you heal. The sleep you get promotes healing. The meals you eat, foods you avoid, physical therapy you do and activities you avoid all play into your new full-time job. Do what you can to eat well, sleep well, and spend your days trending toward success. Sure, there are low days and setbacks, but that comes with your new position as full time recover-er. Push aside your other ambitions for now. This new position has a timeline, so do not rush it or waste time wishing you were somewhere else. 

When I had heart surgery, I went from climbing mountains to struggling to get out of bed. I stopped celebrating summits and started celebrating walking to the end of the block. I searched for progress, looked for healthy ways to improve, and had fun with it. I slept a lot, ate healthfully, and allowed myself to get excited for little things that once seemed simple (getting out of bed, cooking for myself, balancing my warfarin, giving myself Lovenox injections, etc). 

With this idea, there is an art-form in looking forward. We want to look forward to a time of health, but I also want to stress that you do not view life during your recover as wasted time. This less-active time is as much of your life as any other moment; do Not waste it. 

I might not have been able to climb mountains, but I could travel/learn Spanish! 

Before you begin this trying time, creating a “can do” list is another helpful step. This year, after quitting my job and building out a camper van in preparation for a year-long rock climbing road trip, I tore my ACL. The first after my diagnoses, I spent a lot of time being sad. This was not part of the plan. Even though I am usually a very positive person, I did not rush the sadness. I let myself be upset; this was horrible and I was devistated. My plan was ruined.  During that first day, I told myself, “today, I will be sad and frustrated. Tomorrow, I will create a new plan.” I knew I was sad because my expectations were destroyed. I needed to create new expectations. 

After such an event, it is easy to create a list of activities we are restricted from. “I’ll never be able to (fill in the blank) again!” Acknowledge those. Surgery sucks. But also make sure that your focus trends toward what you are able to do. Now is the time to learn a language, read books, reconnect with friends, spend more time with family, learn to bake, travel, and whatever else you have pushed aside. 

Do things you’re proud of. When you learn a language and read books, you will feel productive and healthy. Without a plan and a list, it is easy to get on social media or let days waste away with a new Netflix series. These days of recovery do not have to suck.  You do not have to only get through them. Sure, there is pain to manage and that is a challenge, but even if your body is ailing, your mind can be set up to thrive. 

This is also a time for leaning on your support team. While you recover, whether it is a heart surgery or ACL, ask for help. There will be a lot of tasks that might be hard to complete. Cooking, showering, and even just getting around the house can be a challenge. Allow others to be there for you.  Usually, I am a fiercely independent person.  I like to do everything for myself and prefer to spend my time helping others. During my big surgeries, I gave that up for a while. I was weak and I needed help. 

I chose to see my post-surgery recoveries as a time for growth. This year, I spent months learning Spanish. When I was ready to walk, I traveled around Central America. I was sometimes sad that I could not rock climb, but changing my passion proved to be pretty easy and recovery from surgery was a very productive and healthy time. Now, after 10 months, I am readjusting to life as it was before my operation. This willingness to do life differently for about a year was the best I have ever made. 

Back in the mountains with a mechanical heart valve, fresh ACL, and more passion for it than ever before 

All of this, and my point here, is to say that you can take control of a situation where you may feel helpless. Be healthy, communicate with your health team, be productive, don’t develop a “missions-out” mentality, and make sure to celebrate all of your successes. You’ve got this!